12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas: Ernie Luis

Welcome to the first 12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas.  Over the next twelve days I will post some interviews from my favorite authors.  I have a great line up for you and some great surprises.

Without further adieu I present:

12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas featuring Ernie Luis

The 12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas (10)Ernie Luis was first featured on the blog on August 19, 2015, if you have not had the chance to read his first interview you can read it here.

Ernie Luis is a college student down in Miami studying sports and fitness. He loves drinking beers and growing beards. Hobbies include adventures and road trips with friends, obnoxiously yelling at his favorite sports teams whether they’re doing good or bad, and eating. When he’s not doing any of those, he’s probably writing and chasing his dream of telling people stories.

1.) What is your favorite Christmas song and why?

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen – Fit for a King.

It’s Christmas, and its metal. Rocking Christmas!

2.) What is your favorite Christmas time food or snack?

Christmas cookies for sure. And also those milk chocolates shaped like Santa. I eat the feet first. Cause I’m that kinda guy.

3.) What is your favorite reindeer and why?

Dasher, because he’s the point man.

4.) What is your favorite Christmas movie?

DIE HARD,

because it is, in fact, a Christmas movie.

5.) What is your favorite thing about the Christmas season?

The cool weather. Because it’s the one time of year we get it in Florida.

6.) What is one thing you always wanted for Christmas but never got?

A lightsaber. Still waiting on it.

7.) Do you prefer a real or fake Christmas tree?

Real all the way.

8.) Are you an early gift buyer or a last minute shopper?

Last minute shopper. Amazon is always clutch.

9.) What was your favorite Christmas tradition as a child?

Waiting for everyone to open their gifts after weeks of trying to predict what they got.

10.) We all know Grandma didn’t get run over by a reindeer. What really happened?

So Grandma was heading to the living room to set the plate of cookies for Santa, when all of a sudden, there he was, in all his bearded greatness.

He flinched when he saw her. “Are those for me?” he asked, pointing at the plate of cookies.

“That depends,” Grandma said. “What did my grandchildren get for Christmas?”

Santa glanced a sullen look towards the gift-wrapped boxes under the tree. “You must understand,” he said. “Your grandchildren made the naughty list. They weren’t very nice to little Greg across the street.”

Grandma hid the plate of freshly baked cookies behind her, keeping them from sight, the teasing smell still lingering.

“Give me those cookies,” Santa said, his face turning sour.

“No.”

They glared at each other for a few silent moments. Santa dropped his bag of gifts on the floor, a heavy thud coming from the carpet. “It doesn’t have to be like this,” Santa warned.

Grandma reached into the kitchen and grabbed a Ziploc bag, tossing the cookies from the plate, sealing them inside. “Then give my grandchildren what they asked for.”

Santa reached in his bag of gifts and pulled out a massive Nerf machine gun, a belt of ammo hanging from the feeder, fully loaded. “The list is sacred.”

Grandma grabbed a foam sword from the floor. “And so are these cookies,” she said.

Santa roared, firing the Nerf gun, raining down dozens of foam bullets on Grandma. She somersaulted out of the way, dodging bullets in every which direction, taking cover behind the couch. “They should’ve been nicer!” Santa shouted.

Grandma heard a click, click, click, and vaulted over the couch, with Santa out of bullets. She swung down hard with her foam sword, hitting Santa on top of the head, knocking the Christmas hat off his bald head. Santa stood there stunned, while Grandma reached inside his bag of gifts, throwing out a few random ones towards the tree. “My grandchildren will get their gifts!” she shouted.

Santa’s face turned even redder. “Just give me the cookies!”

Grandma bolted to the front door, with Santa chasing after her. She ran outside and scooped a snowball off the front lawn, tossing it back at Santa. “Never!” she yelled.

A clacking sound came from the roof, and suddenly a reindeer came crashing down on her, running her over by the snow filled sidewalk. She tried to get away, but she was pinned underneath the hoof of the reindeer. Santa came over, patting it on the back. “Good job, Dasher.” Santa reached down and took the Ziploc bag of cookies from Grandma’s hand. He opened it up and ate a few scraps of crumbled chocolatey goodness.

He knelt down beside her and whispered in her ear, “I’ll see you next year, Grandma.”

Special Christmas Message from you to the readers:

A very merry Christmas to you all! And thank you for reading my interview, and for stopping by the Leighgendarium. As a special thanks, I will be giving away an ebook copy of my novel, ALTERNATE. All you have to do is answer this: If you were squaring off with Santa, like Grandma did above in honor of her naughty children, what weapon would you use? (Must be a toy!)

The giveaway will end on Sunday December 13, 2015 at 8:00 am (est).

*****

I would like to thank Ernie Luis for participating in the 12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas.

Make sure you get registered for his giveaway.  Of this story, Samuel Peralta said, “I read his first book and missed my subway stop. And I offered him a Chronicle title that same day. Young guy, very new…. but amazing writer.”

If you want to learn more about Ernie Luis or his books you can visit his website (don’t forget to sign up for his newsletter) or you can follow him on Facebook and Twitter.

About leighgendarium

Preston Leigh, with the help of many in the indie community, is the founder of The Leighgendarium.

15 Responses to 12 Leighgendary Days Of Christmas: Ernie Luis

  1. Pingback: Uncanny Valley - One Lazy Robot Blog

  2. I would use a squirt gun filled with the milk from the glass put out for Santa! Loved your version of what really happened to grandma, hilarious. Thank you and Merry Christmas

  3. Muck him up in that slime stuff and plays doh and when the the play doh hardens like it does (when you don’t get the cap on good) he will be trapped and you can deliver him to the police.

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